Pregnancy and Birthing Stories Series Part 3

Yá’á’tééh! For the third installment of our birthing series, co-hosts Amber-Rose Begay and Lexa Ingram interview Alyssa Peaches Armendez, a young Diné woman, mother, wife, and small business owner will be sharing her pregnancy with twins and birthing experiences in this episode.

We appreciate Alyssa for sharing her beautiful stories with us. The purpose of this series is to provide a space for birthing families to share their experiences to help other birthing families become informed about the ways pregnancy and birthing can happen.

Disclaimer: We’d like to let our audience know that these birthing stories include real people with real stories and may include topics on traumatic pregnancy and birthing experiences leading to loss of life, miscarriage, depression, suicide, and grief. If you are listening, please take breaks as needed. If these topics are too much for you to handle, please join us again for our next episode and take care of yourself in the meantime.

Check out our social media pages!

Facebook: @Navajo Maternal and Child Health Project at Diné College

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Please email us if you have any questions, comments, or suggestions: navajomchproject@dinecollege.edu

This podcast was sponsored by the Arizona Department of Health Services through federal funding from the Health Resources & Services Administration, with support from the Navajo Native American Research Centers for Health (NARCH) Partnership between Diné College and Northern Arizona University through federal funding from the National Institute of Health’s National Institute of General Medical Sciences, award number S06GM142121. The views expressed are the sole responsibility of the program staff and do not necessarily reflect the views of the Arizona Department of Health Services or the United States Government.

Transcript

Introduction
Ya'at'eeh. Welcome to the MCH podcast where we discuss maternal and child health topics and provide strategies for improving the health of Navajo families. Amá dóó áłchíní ats’íís baa áháyá baa yadelti (Translation: We will be talking about the health of mothers and children).

Amber-Rose Begay
I am your co-host Amber-Rose Begay. Hashk’ąąhadzohi nishli, Táchii’nii bashichiin, Tábąąhá dashichei, Naakai Dine’é dashinali. Nataani Nez denashaa. I’m originally from Shiprock, NM where I live and work at Diné College as a project coordinator of the Navajo Maternal and Child Health Projects. I am a Navajo woman and mother of two.

Lexa Ingram
Hello, I’m your co-host Alexandrea Ingram but I prefer to go by Lexa. I was born and raised in Phoenix, Arizona, however, I currently reside in Flagstaff, Arizona. I graduated this May from Northern Arizona University (NAU) with a Bachelor of Science in Health Sciences: Public Health and minors in Biology and Psychology. I am grateful to work at the Navajo Maternal and Child Health Project and be a part of this episode today.

This episode is a continuation of a new series about pregnancy and birthing experiences. The purpose of these episodes are to provide a space for birthing families to share their stories in the hopes that it will help other birthing families to be informed about ways that pregnancy and birthing occurs. Before we begin, we’d like to let our audience know that these birthing stories include real people with real stories and may include topics on traumatic pregnancy and birthing experiences leading to loss of life, miscarriage, depression, suicide, and grief. If you are listening, please take breaks as needed. If these topics are too much for you to handle, please join us again for our next episode and take care of yourself in the meantime.

Today, We are joined by Alyssa Peaches Armendez. Alyssa, can you please introduce yourself?

Alyssa Peaches Armendez
Hello. Ya'at'eeh. Shí éí Alyssa Peaches yinishyé. Tséjiniké nishłí. Tsédeeshgiizhnii bashichiin. Mescalero Apache éí dashicheii. Kinłichíí’nii éí dashinalí. Tó Naneesdizí dęęnashaa’. Hello, my name is Alyssa Peaches Armendez. I am from Tuba City, Arizona. I am a mother, a wife, and a small business owner.

Amber-Rose Begay
Now we're gonna move forward and ask Alyssa to share her pregnancy and birthing story.

Alyssa Peaches Armendez
So my story begins in 2021. I had been feeling really tired. It was April. It was May. All of April. Okay, so all of April I had been really tired, more than normal, and was just, had no energy to do anything. So we were planting, getting our garden ready, my husband and I, and I had noticed that my breasts were super tender and I noticed I had started cramping. And I was telling my husband I was like, “I think I might be pregnant. I don't know.” And I was freaking out because I was like, “Oh my gosh, what if I'm pregnant? And what are we going to do?” Just all of that stuff was running through my head.

But at the same time, I was so excited. I was really excited because my husband and I, we had been together for about ten years and we had tried for a long time to have babies or to have a baby. And nothing ever happened. Nothing was working. So. I had kind of just accepted like, okay, we're not going to have, we're not going to be able to be parents. So I guess that's fine. But at the same time, in the back of my head, I had always told myself when I was young that I would prepare myself, that I would prepare my body to become pregnant.

So at the beginning of 2021, I had started to change my diet. I just…my health, everything: my body, my spirit, everything. I had, I had wanted to be a mother. I knew it was time for us to really to start trying because we were getting older. But we were like, I was 30, I had turned 30 and I was like, okay, I really want to try to become a mom now. I think it's, I think it's time. So I had basically become the best version of myself, like physically, mentally, spiritually, emotionally, everything; I was ready. So like, we were trying, but we weren't trying. Like, like if it happened, it happened.

So, when it came to that point, that day, I took a pregnancy test. We had just planted our corn for the summer and I just had this gut feeling. I was one day late with my period, I was one day late and I was like, “Oh my gosh, I think I'm pregnant. Like my boobs are big.” So we went to the store and my husband was watching TV and I said, “OK, I’m gonna take the test now.”  He was like, “Okay.” So I went into the bathroom and I was really nervous and I was like, “No, I can't be positive. It’s not gonna be positive. Like, I can't be, I can’t be pregnant.” So I did the test and then I let it sit for a few minutes and I saw it and it was two lines and I was like, “Oh my God, wait, what does this say?” So I kept like going back and forth to the box, like, two lines means this, that's positive. And I was like, “Oh my gosh, I'm pregnant.”

And then I had texted my husband, I said, “Come here into the bathroom.” So he came into the bathroom and I showed him. I just, like, pointed at the thing. And he looked at it and he did exact same thing as I did. He grabbed the box and he was looking at this. He was looking at it like, “this says this and that's is that, so…you're pregnant? And I had just, like, started crying. I was, like, ugly crying so hard. And I was just like, I'm pregnant. Like, I'm pregnant! And my husband face was so funny because I looked at him and I was crying and it's all these emotions. And he had just gone like white. His face, like, just dropped, his eyes so big. And he sat down on the toilet seat and then I was like, “Are you okay?” And then I was like, Let's go. Let's get out of the house, because my mom was in the next room and I wasn't ready to, like, tell her and be like, “Mom, we're pregnant.” So I was like, This is our moment. This is our time to, like, take it in and to talk about it. So we left and yeah, we, we went for a drive and it was kinda was, it was like night, it was nighttime, and we still just left and we were just crying. And I was like, I'm so happy. I can't believe I'm pregnant. I said, “You know how long I've waited for this to happen?” And I was like, I can't believe it. Like, am I really pregnant? So I believe it was that next, it was a Saturday and that we had planted. So I had was going to go see the hospital Monday. So I figured it out, we had another test and I told my husband I was like, “Well, maybe one isn't right, so I'm going to take one in the morning again, because they say, like the first pee is like the best pee or something to test.” So I did. I went to the bathroom and I just couldn't sleep. So I was like, really excited. I was like, “Oh my gosh, I can't believe I'm pregnant. Is this real?”

So we went to sleep. I woke up like  seven in the morning and I was like I’m going to take a test to see what it says. So I take the test and again, it changed so quick and it was positive. I was like, okay, I'm pregnant. There's two, two tests. So I came back into our room and my husband was like, “what’d it say?” I was like “it's like in the positive silly.” So we had did everything. We went to the doctor's appointment and everything, and they confirmed the pregnancy. So we got that little paper and everything. And then we still had decided to not say anything to our family. And it was May. And I took that test.

So my mom, my husband went to work and my mom was like, Oh, we have to do all this stuff outside and like all this yard work, we're gonna throw all this stuff away. And she was like, We have to lift all of this heavy stuff. And I was like, Oh no, I can't be like doing super strenuous work. Like, I have to be really mindful of myself now of like the things that I do. And so I was like, “Oh, uhh my back hurts” and just trying to make basic excuses because I was still just like, I wanted to like with it, like just by myself and my husband. And so my plan was to do, to let her know on Mother's Day because it was like two weeks away. But she had, my mom and my family, were like, ya you know, we're gonna do this and we can do all this yard work and all this stuff and like, “Oh my gosh, I can't do that. How do I tell them? Like, I can't, I'm pregnant.” You know what I mean?

So I had told my husband, I was like, Let's do it cute. Like, I've always wanted to do this. I was like, Let's do a cute, like, reveal to my my mom and my sister. So we got like, a little mug. I got a mug for my sister it said, “Best auntie.” And then I got this little framed wooden piece, or it said, “The best grandma” or “the best moms or make the best grandmas or something.” And so my husband and I went into Flag and we bought all that stuff, and I was so tired. I was tired and I was like, I wanted to take a nap. And I never nap, I never nap. So I was like, if I start napping, my family's gonna know and they're going to be like, “Why? Why are you so tired? You aren’t supposed to be napping in the daytime.” So like, Oh my gosh, I have to tell them and I was just eating like crazy. I was like, straight up Rez Girl. I was like, I want some nachos, I want some pickles, I want some Slush Puppie, and I want some gummy worms, and I want some hot Cheetos. And like, I had those cravings just right in the beginning. And that was pretty much normal because obviously we eat, we eat those often, so it wasn't out of the ordinary. So my mom and them again, they were like, okay, we're going to do this, this and this. And I was like, I can't like, I can't wait until Mother's Day. I can't.

So it was, I think a Saturday. It was a few days almost a week. And I said, Mom and my sister, I said, “Come into the living room. I have something to give you.” So I did the cute little box and everything. And then we both gave it to them and we watched. And it just so happened my aunt came in. She came over to the house was like “Hey, what are you guys doing?” And my husband and I were like, that’s fine. Like my aunt is one of my best friends, so like, she's a big part of my life too. So we're like, okay. And my mom, they kind of sat there. They're like, Oh, you open first, you open it first. And I was like, “open it, just open it. Please hurry.” So my mom, oh well they, well, they both opened it and my mom is the one who got it first. She was like, “What? Oh my gosh!” And my sister finally got it. And then my mom came up and she gave me a big hug and she was just crying and so did my sister. And everybody was so happy. We were all ugly crying together. And so it was really exciting and it was almost like a weight off my shoulders. Like, okay, so now we can all prepare together.

So after, after we had told them, I just waited for our next doctor's appointment. Oh, and I did the same thing with my dad. I gave him a little coffee cup that said “Best Grandpa.” And he just it was so sweet. And my dad just cried like a big ol baby. He's a big little teddy bear. He looks really mean, but he's not. He’s just a big softie. But yeah, he he was so excited by then my family and I, we had all collectively like, okay, we need to start taking care of me and don't let me do too much. All of this stuff, like just really protecting me and Mother's Day had come around and everything.

So, we had our appointment and that went well. And so it came to about ten weeks, our first ultrasound, and there was a few like, maybe a week before then. There was one day where I kept seeing twins. Twins, twins, twins everywhere. When I was cutting my friend's hair, and I had told them, we didn't tell really hardly anybody, and I told them I was like guess what? I'm pregnant. And we were, he was so excited and he was like, “What if you have twins?” And I was like, haha that's not funny because twins run in my family. My older sister was supposed to be a twin, but it was only her who made it through. So me getting pregnant, I knew there was a very big chance I would have twins. And I had seen something on TV about twins, like a show. And then some stuff had popped up on my phone about twins. And finally, like, the last thing, my husband came home from work and he was like, Oh my gosh, I did this lady's house because he used to be a satellite technician. And he was like, I did this girl's house and she had twins. And I was like, “Shut up.” I was like, That is not funny. He was like, “What?” And he was like, really taken back. He was like, “What did I say?” I said, “I’ve been seeing twin stuff all day!” And I'm a very huge, like a big believer in signs. Like if some thing is meant to be, you're going to see all the signs leading up to it. And I was like, “Shut up! She didn’t, shut up. You didn't see that?” She, I've been seeing stuff all day and you're like, It doesn't mean it doesn't mean anything. I was like, yes, it does. I said that “everything means something. Nothing is nothing.” And that girl he was talking about, we grew up together. So she had twin boys and I was like, Oh my God, she can't believe that's so exciting. So anyway, come up to our first ultrasound, ten weeks, and that night before, I was just so anxious I could not sleep and I was like, I know it. I said something like, “There might be two that come up. I don't know, like, what's going to happen. I, I'm so scared.” I just had so much. I, well, I was scared. I was just more anxious than anything, like I couldn't sleep.

We got up that morning, we went to our first appointment and even now, just thinking about I feel like I'm anxious again and I just, all those emotions and everything. So we get there. I get called back and I lay down on the thing. He puts the goop on my belly and he put the wand on my belly. And its two, they popped up so quickly, and I was in shock. The first thing I did was I started crying and I was like, Oh my God. And the technician, like, he just started chuckling. He's like, “Huh, twins. Wow.” He's like, “Did you know you were going to have twins?” And my husband, we're all in shock. We're both in shock. And my husband says, “no, like, we didn't know we're were going to have twins.” And then I am just ugly crying so hard. And like the first, one of the first things that come out of my mouth is “what the F?” And I'm crying. And instantly my brain goes to like, How am I going to do this? How am I going to make two babies at the same time? How is my body even going to hold your baby? Like, my first thought was, I can't do this. Like, I, my body, like, how am I supposed to do this? This is my very first time getting pregnant and I'm having twins and I'm just like laying there and listening to their heartbeats. And they're both strong and beautiful.

The ultrasound tech is like “Do twins running your family?” And I said, “Yes, my sister is supposed to be a twin.” And the first thing he says, “okay, well, you're going to have to come in more because twin pregnancies are a lot, are they're very high risk.” It's like saying like, oh, all these things can happen. And I was just thinking like, don't say that to me right now. I'm just trying to process this and just in total shock. So we finish up and my husband and I, we go up to the waiting room and we just sit there. Total silence. I'm crying. And then I get up to use the bathroom and I come out and we're just, we're standing there and we're looking at the window and I'm just crying. And I was like, How am I going to do this? How are we going to do this? And he was like, It'll be okay. It'll be okay. And he was like, they will never be lonely because he's an only child. And I was just like, Oh, my gosh. And like, yah, we have two babies. I have two babies inside. So we come home and I can not wait to tell my mom.

So we come home and I arrange the ultrasound to where it only shows Baby A. And that's the first give away if you know it says baby A then there's a baby B. So, so we come home, the ultrasound picture, and I showed it to her. And I said, well before I show it to her I said, “Mom are you ready to see, your, the baby?” And she’s so excited. My mom has waited forever for grandbabies. She was a mom like “If you get pregnant, this is gonna happen, or if you have sex badaba.” So from a very young age, I was always told, like, don't get pregnant. Basically, like this is going to happen and all these things. So I was just like, okay, I'm not going to get pregnant. And it came to that point to where my mom was like, Well, when are you going to have a baby? And she would always say, All my friends have grandbabies. And I'm like, So those so what? You know what I mean? Like, we're still living our best life, Mom.

So anyway, I gave her the ultrasound picture and she was crying and she's so excited and I tell her. I said, “Open, open the thing. Open it. There's more pictures.” So she's looking through. And then finally she gets to the one with both babies and she sees it and she starts screaming and she's like, Oh, my gosh twins! And I have never seen my mom jump before. My mom was like jumping up and down and she was just screaming and she was so happy. And I wanted to tell my sister but my sister was at work and I was like, I can't wait. I want to tell her like right now. So we Facetime her and I showed her like, the first one, like I did my mom. Okay, here's the baby. Here’s the next picture. Here's the next picture. And then here's both the babies. And her face was so funny. She was looking, looking, and then she's like, “Uhh” and her mouth drops open and she's like, “Uhh, there's two. And I was like, “There’s two babies!” So yeah, that was pretty much the big reveal.

And just knowing like, my body and basically knowing I was going to have two babies because of all the signs. So after that, kinda let it seep in again for a while and the shock was definitely still there. And we kinda just, I was so exhausted all the time. I was so tired and I was telling my mom, I said, “I've never been this tired before. Like, I don't understand.” And it was so funny because like after the ultrasound I wasn't showing like, I had like a little bit of bloating, you know, after that, my belly had popped out. Right like that next my belly popped out and I was like my babies are growing. I was like, they finally can say, “Look, Mom, we're right here. We're in here. It's okay.”

So once we found out we were having twins, I said, I'm not going to say anything to anybody. This is nobody's business but our own. I want to keep a safe space for myself. I want to keep it private, and I want to enjoy all of this as much as I can. I don't want like, any outside, like, all these questions. You know what I mean? You know how people like to ask a zillion questions and just like, basically overstep that boundary? I didn't want any of that. So I decided I'm not going to tell anybody I'm pregnant. I want to enjoy this with my family, with my husband, so that's what we did. We kept it under wraps and I think I was born between June, July, and it was up to July because I would go, we would go out to like the flea market to like, so like, go sell like bedding and everything and then my belly through to get bigger and bigger. So I was like, okay, okay, I'm going to just like step out of the public for a while and just because Covid was still super real. And were some people getting sick like cluster here and there. So I was like, I can't get sick. Like I have to protect myself as much as I can. So that's what we did. And then like the first and the second trimester, we're smooth. Like, I had absolutely no morning sickness. I had a few food aversions, but it wasn't like, I hate everything. It was kind of random, like the stuff that I didn't like. I didn't like eggs, I was bummed out about that, I didn’t like eggs and I couldn't stand the smell of, like, simple green. I don’t know why, that was so random. And like, coleslaw, I remember I had taken like a scoop of coleslaw and I was like, “This is sick. And I just ran and I spit it out.

But yeah, so everything was going really smoothly. I was going, getting massages still and I was still going to see the chiropractor every week just to help with my, my little aches and pains and everything. And going into my third trimester, it was kind of tough because that's when they did gestational diabetes test and all of that. And, so I had developed gestational diabetes. I was really bummed out because it took away a lot of my like just little indulgence and I before I got pregnant I never ate candy. Like, I didn't enjoy sweets or I didn't have like a ton of junk food and stuff. But once I got pregnant, I was like, Oh my God, I want a cherry limeade, I want some candy, I want those sour worms, and some sweet tarts, just all this stuff. And I was like, “Eww. Who is this person? I don't even know who this is.” So once I found out, like I had gestational diabetes I had to check my sugar after I ate and I had to cut back on like an apple juice, I frickin loved apple juice. I want, I like apple juice and like oranges and like those little cuties. And I was super bummed out and I was like, “Why can I just have that? Like, just let me live, please.” So yeah, I had that.

And then towards the very end, while basically the whole third trimester, I had gotten severely, severely puffy and I started getting migraines. I've always gotten migraines, but when I was pregnant, I feel like I had the more often. I had headaches all the time. And I think it just went hand in hand with not sleeping and being able to sleep properly and just not being able to get comfortable and everything. So I had developed pre-eclampsia, my third trimester, and I had gone into the hospital a lot because I was scared, you know what I mean? Like my blood pressure, we were checking at home all the time and then I had to worry about my sugar. I had to worry about myself, like, am I eating, am I sleeping? And I’d have a headache and I'd be so puffy and uncomfortable. But when I was pregnant, I didn't look like I was having twins. My belly wasn't, like, crazy big. I wasn't like waddling back and forth or anything. It wasn't until the very end.

So I had gone to the hospital a lot just to get checked out. And then I kinda think the OB, the midwives were like, “You're fine.” And I'm like, I don't know if anything's wrong, but I would get contractions a lot like Braxton Hicks. And they're like, That's normal. And that's one of the biggest things that was hard for me was people telling me like, “Well, that's normal.” That's like, that's this is not normal for me; I've never been pregnant so I would like a little bit of empathy, you know what I mean? Like, especially when I first got pregnant in the beginning, like, “Oh, well, that's normal. That's normal. That's normal.” And it's like, can you just understand that I'm a new mom? Like, I've never been in this situation before, so. So yeah, but I had a really good team, always of, like, midwives and like doctors because I would just go like 10 minutes for like into Tuba city so the hospital, was right there. My sister and I have like a ton of friends who were like nurses, who were midwives, who were all stuff, and my sister was a paramedic. And so I had like, okay, what about this, this and this? And they were like, okay, well, you can probably wait for a little while and I think it's worth going to hospital. So I have always been like really anxious, have a lot of anxiety and I'm good at listening to my body and if anything is off, I’m like something is off, I need to go to the hospital. But yeah, like I had developed preeclampsia and it was hard. It was really hard. Towards the end of my pregnancy, I had so much pain, like in my back, in my hip, my feet would just swell up. I've never been that puffy ever before. So, and it was funny because, like, they tell you, like, “Oh, you need to exercise, you need to walk and you need to do this.” I said, “But I can't. Like, I physically can't because it hurts so bad, like in my body.” And I would get so puffy if I was on my feet for too long. I would just swell up. And they feel like, Well, you need a rest, but you need exercise, you need to do this. And it's like, Can I exist in my safe space? And I don't need everybody poking at me and taking my sugar, telling me I can't do this, and telling me I need to do this. Like, just give me my space and I'm going to grow with my babies. My babies and I are safe, we're fine. They both, they were both measuring very healthy, healthy weight and.

Oh, and then I didn't tell you about, like the gender because we had found that the genders, when we found out, it was only one of the genders. I don't remember how many weeks I was, but we went to my, the ultrasound and they were trying to get the sex of both babies, but it wasn't working. So we told the ultrasound tech like, “Can you just put it in an envelope and we'll open it when we're ready.” So they did that and my husband and I got out to our truck and I was like, “I can’t wait, can we open it?” So we did. And it was a boy. Our baby, baby B was a boy. So he was sitting up on my right side, right below my ribs, and I started crying and I was so excited. And, we had to wait another like four weeks, three or four weeks for the other ultrasound. Finally, baby A let them get the picture. And it was a girl. So I had because I was scared, I was like, “Oh my God, what if I get two boys? What am I supposed to do with two boys?” So once we found out we were having a girl, I was just like, so excited because I've always been about balance. Like in anything that I did I've always tried to keep that balance. And I said, it makes so much sense. I'm having a boy and a girl and we were so excited, but we didn't have like a gender reveal or anything. I like I said, I wanted to keep it really, really simple to keep my safe space and I didn’t want people touching me or like asking a zillion questions. But yeah, that's how the gender reveal went.

So third trimester, a lot of puffy. I had, by then, my the last few weeks of my pregnancy, I was going in twice a week into with the OB to get the babies heart rate, everything to see if they were okay, to see if they're growing accordingly. So I was in there at the hospital a lot, so I was kind of just like, okay, I'm tired now. My belly’s getting bigger by the day it feels like and by then I was big, like my belly was really big and I didn't really have like a ton of stretch marks. My mom, whenever she saw me, like trying to itch or like rub my belly she’d come up and like slap my hand like “Don’t scratch, you’re going to get stretch marks.” But I was always on top of keeping my skin moisturized, everything. So, it wasn't until, I think maybe two weeks before I went into labor I had developed this rash like inside my stretch marks. I was like, scratching and I said “I don't think this is right because I shouldn't be this itchy. Like, like I can't stop scratching it. It's burning. I can't get comfortable.” Like, I had to just walk around in my bra, basically, because I didn’t like anything touching it. So I went in and then I had been diagnosed with PUPPPs. So that's a rash that's more common in like women with multiples, so just like in over excess of a certain hormone. I was put on some different creams and everything and it lasted for maybe about a week. And then it finally stopped and I was like, Oh my gosh. But by then I had scratched a lot there were just like one part of my belly that had little scabs and everything because I was so itchy and I was so sad and I was like, my pretty belly is gone and I didn't get to like take super cute maternity pictures, like with my bare belly. And I was like, no it's ruined and I don't want to. But anyways, so yeah, that's done. We got that taken care of or it basically ran its course.

And the first time I went in like a false labor I guess you could say, I had a lot of pain. I had so much pain in my back and I kept having contractions. And so we went over to the hospital and we had everything ready already, like our bags and like snacks and everything. And I had made a list of everything that we needed and we had a plan, basically. So we went to the hospital, I think I stayed like overnight. And it was my husband and my mom and we were just like stuck in this little room. And I was walking around, having contractions, back and forth, just walking around. And it was kind of terrible because it was Covid so I couldn’t walk around like in the OB ward. I couldn't walk around and they were doing construction too so I had to just like walk through the door to the wall, door to the wall. So, they had checked me and I was like two centimeters. I was like, “Huh, that's it. Okay.” So the doctor was like, it's okay like you can go home. And I was kind of like, I was really bummed out, like I don’t want to go home, I want to have my babies, and but I was like, it's okay. Like, it's not, clearly they're not ready yet and they're still cookin’, so they're not ready to meet anybody yet. They like being in mama, mama's belly, they’re safe. By then I think I was like 35 weeks. And with twins, they say 37 weeks is full term. So 37 weeks, and so I'm like, okay, I'll just hold out like another two weeks, basically.

So I had gone back again for my regular two times a week to get hooked up to the monitor, to watch their heartbeat, listen to their heartbeats, and everything. So that's what we did. And then I had been keeping track of my belly, like through pictures, the memory thing, and I noticed my belly was dropping day by day it’d kind of go a little bit more, a little bit more. And then I was like, okay, I'm kinda like, I'm tired of being pregnant now. Like, I don't want to be pregnant anymore. Like, it hurts. It's way too painful. I can't sleep, I can't breathe because my babies were like pushing up. And then like, my daughter was so active. And then my son, he was a sweet boy. He just like to stay really close to my mama and he just with snuggle up like, I don't know how to explain it, but I can feel how they are, how they were in my womb as how they are still today. Like, my daughter's so sassy she would not let any of the midwives get her heart rate. She would just go on and off the monitor. She would kick me and she kicked my bladder, she would fight her brother. And my son is so sweet, he would just do everything. I’d be like you guys have to settle down, we need to get your heart rate. And my daughter would just be like, No, I'm not doing it. I don't like it. I don't know you. Basically, you're not going to listen to my heart. So she's always been like super feisty.

Okay. So by then, I was done being pregnant and I was like, okay, I'm going to like eat dates. I'm going to like, have some spicy foods. I'm going to drive on a dirt road. So we were driving on a dirt road and my husband hit this one pothole and I just like dropped and I screamed and I was like, “Stop! Don't go any further!” I was like that hurt. I was like I'm done; I can't, like, no more dirt road; I don't want to do that anymore because I am having contractions now. We came home and my belly did drop. I got out of the car, my belly dropped and I was like, “What else can we do?” So I spent a lot of time on TikTok, so like, “Hmm. What can we do?” So I was looking at, you know, how they do like the curb walk? They go up one, down one, up one, down one. So I was doing that up and down the street. I wasn't going very far, maybe like 20 yards. I was going back and forth and I was like so out of breath, and I was like “I think that's okay.” So, so I came back inside, like, had a snack and I was like, okay, I'm going to watch some Harry Potter because it was like Harry Potter weather outside like it was all nice and gloomy. And I was like, “Oh yeah, I need some Harry Potter in my life.” So I just laid up on the bed and I had my snacks and my water and I frickin’ loved ice water, like ice water all the time. That's all I wanted. So I had my water and everything and my husband was making dinner and I was just talking to the babies and telling them what I was doing and asking if they were okay.

So I was having contractions pretty, pretty steadily. And like, I wasn't really timing them, but they were coming in pretty steady. And my husband said, “It's time to eat.” He made like spaghetti and garlic bread, salad, everything. And I just frickin, I've always loved spaghetti. So I was like, “Oh, I can't wait.” So I got up, waddled into the dining room, and I was getting ready to eat. He had already had my food set up for me and I was getting ready to eat and I kind of just like dropped to my elbows and I just started crying so hard because I felt my belly drop and I was just in instant pain. I started crying and I kind of almost was like, like I was ready to hyperventilate, basically. And I was like, I think it's like I think like, I think this is it. Like, I'm like, this hurts so bad. I've never felt pain like this. And I just started crying and like, I couldn't sit down because of like all that pressure. My husband; I was so close to eating, man, I was so hungry. I was just like let me eat please. But I was crying and my mom and everybody just like, went into like, okay, we got to get everything going, and, “Where's the bags?,” warm up the car because it was December by then and it was cold outside. So they’re like get her jacket, where’s her slippers, all this stuff. Do you have your mask? And ahh, it was like, Do you have your pillows, blankets, where's my stuff? So it was like kind of like everybody like chicken with their heads cut off basically. Everyone was running all over like “Oh my gosh!” And I was just sitting there, like standing there you're running all over my garage and I'm just sitting, like, standing there. I was like, okay, I just need to practice my breathing. Like this is what we prepared for. We are practicing our breathing.

We get into the car, we get our bags loaded and we get to the hospital and my husband is like blazing. I was like “Don’t go on the dirt road. It's way too painful.” So he's like racing, and I told him, I was like, “Slow down, slow down.” I said, “We're okay.” I said, “I'm not bleeding, or, I'm not leaking. Nothing's coming out of me yet.” And I said, “Just slow down.” I said, “I need you to be calm. I need you to be okay for the both of us.” I said, “Because I am freaking the f**k out, basically.” And I was just like, let's bring it down. Simmer down. We're okay. The hospital is just right there. It's not going anywhere. It's okay. So he, he like zooms into the parking lot, and I'm like, okay, we're here. And then he runs inside, and then he gets the wheelchair. And I'm kind of just, like, waddling out. And then by then, I'm just like, in a lot of pain and I'm trying to breathe. And what I kept doing is I kept holding my breath and so he, my husband, was really good at it. He was just like okay, you just need to breathe. Once he settled down, he's like, we're going to breathe and we're going to do this. And so I got into the wheelchair.

We went inside, signed in, and blah, blah, blah. So before he was able to go into the room with me, he had to get tested for COVID first. And really so did I, but they had already put me into the room to get a swab and everything came back negative and they got me hooked up to the monitor. They had me change into the gown, everything. So I was like, holy crap, this is happening, I was like what? I was just watching Harry Potter, like not too long ago, like, holy crap. So I was like kind of freaking out. But at the same time, I was like, I'm okay with this. This is okay. Everything is going to be fine. I got settled and I was just waiting for my husband. So now I'm having contractions and I was just hanging out and the nurses came in and the person who does epidural, she came in with her cart. She's like, “Okay, so you're ready for your epidural?” And I was like, “No, I'm okay for now,” you know? And she was like, “Okay, I'll just leave the cart here for now.” And everybody and every time everybody came in like, “How are you, baby doing?” And I said, “Babies. There's two. I’m having twins.” And once they hear that, they're like, “Oh my Gosh,” and it’s just the same reaction basically, with every person like, “Oh my gosh! Twins, that’s so exciting. Do you know what you’re having? Da-da-da.” And I was kinda just like, “Yes I’m having twins. I’m okay and I don’t need an epidural right now. Where’s my husband?” basically just I'm crying, and I was kind of just like, Yes, I'm having twins. I'm okay and I don't need an epidural right now. Where's my husband?” Basically, that's all I wanted was my husband. So my husband came in and my mom was supposed to come in too. But one of the nurses was like, You know what? Let's just have it be them just for tonight because by then it was already like almost midnight. And they're like, told my mom, like, you can come in in the morning first thing in the morning, come in, we’ll test you, you do everything. Because I was like, I can't do any of this without my mom. Like, I need my mom right by me. I don't care if I'm like 30-something and I need my mom. I need my mom right there with me.

So the night went pretty smoothly, I guess just pretty steady contractions. And because I had pre-eclampsia, I wasn't able to walk around. And, so just to keep my blood pressure kind of low, I guess, to keep me super relaxed, like they put me on magnesium, so I was on bed rest. I couldn’t get up and walk around. And that is not at all what I had envisioned, you know what I mean? You're like, okay, I'm going to go to the hospital. I'm going to be in labor, I get to walk around; cause I was, I've been a part of a lot of births, and that's what they were always able to do. So, but I always knew, like, I have twins, my story is like nobody else's. So that's what I kept telling myself, like, whatever happens happens. As long as my babies are safe, as long as they're okay and I'm okay, I'm fine with whatever is going to happen. So I was like, That's fine. I have preeclampsia, it's not my fault. It's not my baby's fault. It's just what's happening. And I have, like, the worst migraine. I was starving. I didn't eat, dinner. And once I got into the hospital, obviously, they’re like, you can't eat anything. So I wasn't able to eat anything, like, really drink a lot of stuff either. So I was so hungry and I had this massive migraine that just I couldn't even open my eyes. That's how bad that migraine was. And I had the lights way down low, almost completely off in our room. So I just was laying in bed, sitting in bed with my eyes closed, having contractions and all of that.

I think it was a Friday night I went in. A Friday night and then Saturday came something, I don't know. But the morning came, my mom showed up and everything. I kind of felt like a big relief kind of, because I knew my husband was really overwhelmed, like, Oh my gosh. And I was like, I need a team. This is my team. This is my like, these people are my rocks, right. I need them both here. And I wish I could have had my sister in there with me too, but I couldn't just because of COVID and everything. So all day again, contracting, bad migraines, still not able to eat. The day goes on and I had dilated up to like maybe three centimeters. I think I had gone in on the Saturday, Saturday night; Sunday night labored all day those two days. And then through the night, Sunday, that's when my contractions were getting big. They're getting stronger. And I was just so exhausted. I was so tired. I was hungry. And I was scared. Mostly scared. It was funny because my mom and my husband, they said because magnesium makes you sleepy. So I pretty much slept a lot. It just kept me on a constant magnesium drip. So I was tired, that entire time I was sleepy. It's just like a blur, you know what I mean? My, they said when I was sleeping, I would have like, these big, big, big, big, big contractions and like, my belly was tight and I would nap and I was just out. I slept through all of it. So, I like, and I didn't have, like, any type of epidural yet or anything. I was just like riding the wave and I was so sleepy. Sunday night had passed and early in the morning, I was starting to wake up more, though, like with feeling that pain, like the actual pain, like, okay, I'm having contractions, so just like breathing through it. And then I didn't want to wake my husband up because of he needs his rest. My mom and my husband need their rest.

And I had like a strange experience. I had thought somebody came into the room. It was early in the morning, I think it was like around two, two in the morning, my husband and my mom were sleep. And I heard the door open and somebody was like, they were asking if I was okay. And I said, “Yes, I'm okay. Like, I'm just riding the wave.” Like I said, “I'm okay. I'm just trying to breathe. I'm trying to relax.” And like I said, I had kept my eyes closed because my headache was so bad. So I was just laying there and “yah I'm okay,” and I was like, “How are you? I'm okay.” I'm here to check on you when the baby's security and you're doing okay, I’m okay, we're okay. Okay. I'm just tired and, so the nurse had come in and check on me. She took my vitals, all of that. And. And my husband and my mom woke up, and I was like, “Who's that lady? What was that nurse's name?” And they're like, You mean this nurse? And I was like no, it was a different voice, it wasn’t her. I could, you know, how you can just sense things. And I knew my husband and my mom are like, “Uhhhh, there's nobody else that's been in here but us.” So like, well, somebody came in to check on me. I didn't know who she was. So she was really nice and I just went back to sleep. So I thought that was really cool, I guess. I don't know.

And so the morning had passed. I got a new doctor, a new midwife. She was like, okay, it was like seven in the morning when they came and did their rounds. The doctor was like, “You're still at four centimeters.” They had put in pitocin into all of that stuff to kind of speed everything up. And I was like, okay, nothing's happening. So the doctor was like, your blood pressure's been pretty steady, which is good, your sugar is good. So, she was like, I think it's just best to do a C-section. And they were worried about my daughter because they were having a hard time finding her umbilical cord when they had done an ultrasound. So they're like, they don't know if she's getting everything that she needs because we can't see it. So we were like, okay, we're going to do a C-section. And then I had signed the paperwork, and after I had signed the paperwork, *snaps,* everything happened so quick, so fast. And I woke up and I was scared. And I was like, oh my gosh, I'm like, is this really happening? I'm scared. I don't know what's going to happen. I don't know how it's going to go. So I started crying. I was just like really emotional. I was like, I'm scared. I don't know, like, am I going to be okay? Is this safe? You know what I mean? That was my first thought was like, am I going to be okay? So like my mom and everybody, just kinda comforted me and even my sister, she came over to the hospital and she stood at the window, her girlfriend. And I was just so happy to see them and I was like, okay, okay, I'm ready. Let's do this. Let's get these babies out. Like I'm ready to be a mama, I’m ready to see them.

And I kind of just took everything in. Like, to the best of my ability, even though I was like, so tired and I was hungry. All of that. I was like, okay, let's go, I'm ready. Like my body, my body's done pretty much. And they wheeled me down to the room and I was like, I was so lucky to have one of my best friends that worked at the OB ward. And she was working, and she walked, she wheeled me down to the operating room and I was able to talk to her and she just comforted me as much as she could. And I had the best team. I'm telling you, I had the best nurses and CNAs, all of them midwives. I get into the room, well before I left, I gave my mom, like hugs and kisses and she was like, “It'll be okay. You're strong. You can do this. It’ll be okay.” And my husband, I gave him a kiss and everything and he had to stay behind to get ready, to get in a gown and everything.

So I went into the operating room. And this operating room was huge. I think it was the biggest one they had, and it is filled. Like there are so many people in there. All you see is like scrub caps, and like the face covers, and people like with notepads, and like everything. And each baby had their own doctor. So each baby had their own team of doctors and nurses, pediatricians, all of that. I get into the operating room, they switch me over and they tell me to like, bend like me all over kind of so it can get my epidural. And by then I'm shaking so bad because I'm so scared, like, and I'm sweating. I can feel myself sweating and I'm shaking and I'm tired. And like, basically cold sweat because I was really cold and I was shaking and I had a girl's hand. I don't know who she was, maybe a CNA or something. And she was like, “It’s okay.” And she was a young girl, so she was like “It’s okay.” And I was like, “Where is my friend? Where’s my…” Her name is Ashton, my friend, And like, “Where's Ashton?” And she's coming. She's just getting ready. And they were like, okay, they were rubbing, like, they were cleaning my back. And I, I didn't realize how hard I was squeezing the girl, her hand. And then she was like, “Oh, that hurts.” Then I'm like, “I’m sorry. I'm just really scared.” And I was crying and I was having contractions at the same time. And just so many things were happening. And I was just like, Oh my gosh, this, this, is too much. So my friend, one of the other nurses came over and she's like, It's okay, I'll hold your hand. And so she did. She's like, I just want you to relax. And she did a really good job at calming me down, bringing me down, getting my breathing right so I could get my epidural. So I got my epidural and everything.

So I laid down and then they put the sheet up and they had, I had already been hooked up to a bunch of stuff. And I was feeling sick, like nauseous, I was really scared. So I was still shaking and everything. And my husband came in and I was like, Oh my God, I am so happy you're here. And I knew a lot of the doctors and the midwives, so I just knew a lot of people. So I was like, okay, I see like some familiar eyes. I hear familiar voices and they're like, “It's okay, we're going to take care of you. Everything's going to go smoothly, we promise.” And I had a great anesthesiologist. He was awesome. And he was like, okay, I'm here to work the drip, basically. And he was like, I have a phone if you, I'll be recording too, and all this stuff. And he was really helpful with my husband. He was like, kind of calming him down, like, okay, this is going to happen. This is going to happen and you guys are okay. And just thinking about it now, there is, like, just so much excitement and just like anxiety at the same time. Right before they started the procedure, what they did, what the nurses and the doctors did, is they went around, not every single person, but they said their names, said their names like a moment of silence. This is what we're going to do. And they all got quiet. And I was like, amazing. Because that whole like, the vibe and the energy were just like everybody was so determined and it was like a good, good energy, basically. It was awesome. And they're like, Okay, let's go. They made sure I was numb and I couldn't do anything and I couldn't, which was good.

So they started to cut and I just felt like a lot of pressure, like on my stomach, like up in my chest. And before, you know, you heard “It’s a girl” and you heard her cry. I heard her crying and she was so strong. And that was my daughter, Addison. She was born first, she was only three pounds when she was born; she was tiny. And before you know it, I hear another cry, and it's my son. They say, “Oh, well, it's a boy.” And all you heard is like, “Oh, well, look at that cord.” And his umbilical cord was so thick. And like, right after they took him out, he peed. He peed all over me. He peed on their doctors. So they cut his cord and they were working on him. But by then, I was getting like really loopy. I started to feel very, very sick. And I had told my anesthesiologist, I said, “I don't feel good at all” I said, “I need to, I need to throw up.” And he was like, hold on, wait. And when I tell you, like, all that pressure they put on you, like they just push you up, like, push you up. As, and I don't know how hard it is, but they were pushing me up and I was just like, “Ow, that hurt.” And then I just remember turning my head and I started vomiting like all over and I was like, I can't breathe. I can't breathe. And I started to, like, panic. That was it. That's all I remember.

They had put me under and my husband, like his story, like his part is just like so many things happening. And he was scared. I was scared. But, they put me out and I had woken up in recovery. I was so cold, like my body was shaking so bad. I was freezing. Like I've never been that cold in my life. My teeth were chattering so bad. And I kept telling them, I'm like, I'm freezing, like, I'm so cold. And they had put me in one of those, like, heated blanket things, like where it's like puffy and everything. Like, a whatever, like I had my own little heater trying to warm up because I had lost so much blood. I was kind of like in and out. I was in and out. I don't know how long I was in recovery for, but I was so cold and I was just like, “Where's my husband? Where is my husband? Where are my babies? Where's my husband? I want to see my husband.” I kept asking for Gatorade. I don't know why I'm asking for Gatorade. And she was giving me ice chips and everything and I like I was freezing. I'm telling you, I've never been that cold in my life. I've never heard my teeth chatter like that and just shaking uncontrollably because I was so cold. So I was finally stable enough to go back to my room.

Yeah. So I went back to my room and I was out of it still. I was completely out of it. I just felt so sick. I was weak. And I probably was like that. And I remember going back to the room, and then my babies were in the nursery with their dad and their nurses and stuff. And I came back to the room and one of the nurses came back in to check on me and I just started crying. I was like, I missed it.  She was ike, “What do you mean?” I said “I missed it. I wanted to see my baby. I didn’t even get to see my son, I only saw my daughter.” And I started crying and I was like, “Why did that have to happen like that? Why did it have to be so scary?” But I was happy that I was like alive, you know, that my babies were safe and they were healthy. I was just so emotional. And I had told her, like, I just kept saying, like, I missed it. I missed it. I was like, obviously, I was the one giving birth. You know what I mean? I can't be a spectator like on the side to watch myself give birth. And then she was like, “It's okay.” She was like, “You did amazing.” And she just really encouraged me. And she just reassured me, like, you did everything that you were supposed to do. It's okay. Like we're here for you now. You did amazing. After we were done, my husband came in and, oh, my gosh, I just melted. Like, I was so happy to see my husband. And I just sat with him for a while. And honestly, I did it like, even though this isn't what we imagined. Like, we did it. I did it. I gave birth to two babies, and I'm okay like I'm alive. We're here. They're here. They're Earthside like we're parents, what the heck.

So my daughter came in and she’s so tiny. Oh, my gosh, my heart, I think about it. And she's so tiny. She had these big, beautiful eyes that just look right through you. She was so sweet and she had so much hair. She was pink and she was just so perfect. She latched on very quickly. She knew what to do. Like I said, I was so out of it. So I was like, Oh my God, this is my baby. What? I made this. I was just like, I can't believe this. Like, I am a mother. What? And then my mom came in and I was just, like, ugly crying all the way around. And I was so exhausted and I was like, “Can I eat now?” So I was still, they wanted to keep me on, like, a liquid diet for a few days because of, I don't know, it was complications during my C-section, but they had given me staples in case they needed to open me back up. So I was like, “Ahhh that kina not reassuring, but okay.” You know what I mean? Like, I can't do anything about it. So I was like, I guess I'll just drink this broth. And I had a, one of the girls brought in Shasta for me and I was like, Oh my God, this is so good.

So my son was still in the nursery because he had some issues with his breathing. He had it too in Mama's belly. He didn't want to breathe by himself, all of that stuff. So he had a little bit of that fluid in his throat and his chest. So they had to like help him breathe and his sugar and all of that. And he had, he was kind of yellow. So they were just watching him. He was five pounds when he was born, so he was bigger. So together my babies were like eight pounds.

I really wanted to see my son. And they were like, “You can't walk around yet.” And I was like, “Well, I want to see my baby.” So they put me in a wheelchair and oh my gosh, getting up, just getting up from the bed to the wheelchair. I was vomiting, just like I had bad motion sickness and like “Oh, okay. It'll be okay.” So I was like, I just need to see my son. It was maybe from that room to the nursery was maybe like 30 yards. It wasn't very far. And it took us a while, a little while to get there, just because I was so sick. Just like the motion made me really sick. We have to keep stopping so I could throw up. But we made it into the nursery and I did skin to skin and it was so sweet, my little boy, awww. He was so precious and it looked like his hair was really light compared to his sisters. And he was so cute. He was just exactly what we had seen, what I had imagined. And I'm like, Oh my gosh, you guys are so perfect. I can't believe I had two babies.

I stayed with them for as long as I could. And then we went back to the room, and after that, everything just seemed like a huge blur. Like two babies. Nobody ever expects two babies. So, like, they had double the duty, like we had so much help, and lactation support was awesome. And the hospital here is very what is it called? Like breastfeeding, they really want you to breastfeed. So they were like showing me all these things like, okay, we're going to feed them like this. And one can be on this boob, the other can be on that boob. My milk was still coming in. I think they came in, it came pretty quickly, actually, which I was thankful for, and just trying to keep myself fed and like hydrated and basically not to sneeze or cough because of my position, you know what I mean? So I was in a lot of pain still and just having them come in and like massage your tummy and then even breastfeeding, I was still getting contractions like cramping all of that. So it was,  it was really painful. But I was like, okay, I have to get up, so I have to take care of my babies. I have to learn how to do this because I'm a mom now; what the heck? But yeah, so we stayed in the hospital for about ten days just because the baby's, their weight drop. And my son kept having like issues feeding. He just kept going to sleep. All he wanted to do was sleep. My daughter was fine, though. She was amazing. I can't believe how tiny and mighty she was. Like she had zero problems. She was like I'm all right Mom, it’s just him. Like, I don't know what his deal is. And all the nurses like, always said like, “Oh, it's always a boys you have to worry about. They're just lazy and they’re something else.” And then all the nurses and the doctors were like, “Yeah, it's just the boys you have to worry about. The girls are amazing.” And I was so lucky to be able to stay in the hospital, like we didn't have to get transferred out. We didn't have to get flown to Phoenix or Flagstaff, anywhere, because that was one of my biggest fears too. Like, I don't want to go like, I want to stay in Tuba. I know Tuba is amazing. Like their services, they have a great OB ward, they're going to take care of us. And they did. They did amazing. And by like day nine, I was just, I was a mess because I wanted to go home and like I wanted to sleep in my bed. I wanted to just, I wanted my mom, I wanted my sister, you know? And so on day ten, finally we were able to go home and we had a doctor that was a pediatrician that was like super, she had really bad anxiety, basically, like, “what if this happens?” And I'm just like, like I live 5 minutes away, I'm not going to be taking them to Phoenix or to like the Flagstaff, you know what I mean? Like, please don't act like I'm not able to care for my children because I already know what's best for them and then I'm not going to take them anywhere. I can't even barely do things myself, so I'm not going to be going anywhere. So we stayed home. We made it home. And it was so awesome because my mom and my sister had decorated the house. So we came home and it's like, welcome home, like balloons and boy and girl stuff and baby stuff. And my sister and her partner had set up everything already in the nursery for us, so that was really nice.

So the babies were born on the 13th of December. We got home ten days later and then it was Christmas already. So how I shared the news that I had the babies was on Christmas. I took a snapshot of their feet and everything and I just let people know that we are a family of four now. So that's how I announced it. I did it on Facebook and then I did it on Instagram and pretty much everybody lost their minds. And so like a select few already knew, but it was pretty cool to share. It was really, really exciting and it still is exciting being able to tell people we have twins. 

Yeah, that's pretty much my birth story. I mean, it's crazy when, when I think about it, I just have so many emotions still. I'm very emotional about it. And I'm just so happy, like I, I'm alive, basically, and that I'm able to take care of my kids. And I had amazing support and they had the best team of doctors. And my husband says he remembers one of the doctors saying, “I'm not leaving her. We're not leaving her till she is stable, till everything.” And I know her, I’m not, she's not I'm not leaving her, basically. I’m staying with her until you guys are finished. And he was like, okay, I know she's in good hands, but yeah, just having the amazing support of the doctors and everything, my family. But the hardest part for me is postpartum. That is, that was and it still is hard because my babies are 17 months now.

Amber-Rose Begay
Wow, I was wondering how long ago this, you, you gave birth, and how old the babies were. But thank you for sharing.

Alyssa Peaches Armendez
Yeah.

Amber-Rose Begay
It touched my heart in so many ways. And I just wanted to cry with you and oh, thank you for sharing that. Yeah, postpartum, I  was going to ask you how it's going now. And also, do you have any advice for new parents?

Alyssa Peaches Armendez
Yeah, postpartum for me was really hard. I had been diagnosed with postpartum depression a few months ago at the beginning of the year, pretty much. So I struggled really bad, almost right at the get-go. I would say just the lack of sleep. That's what it was, just the lack of sleep, healing and then just being a new parent like you don't know anything. This is like your first day at the job. Basically, every day, every day is different. There are no two days that are the same. So I just really struggled finding, not myself, but just coming into my new role as a mother and basically not being able to have support from other moms. That's what I noticed. I had a close group of friends that were really supportive, but at the same time I had other people that had found out I had twins and they would say like, “Oh, just wait till this happens, or just wait til this, well my pregnancy was like this and I had morning sickness,” all this other stuff. And it really brought me down because I was like, why can't we just be supportive? Like, this isn't even about you. Like, I new I have twins, you will never understand what it's like because you have a single kid, I have two. And that was the hardest part for me. And my husband is just being able to find, like our support, like other parents, other twin parents. Even now we still struggle with it, but at the same time, like we're so happy we have each other and we have, we're very good at communicating and setting boundaries. And my biggest goal is keeping my baby safe.

So like for new parents, like what I would say, like the advice I would give is like, be kind to yourself. Like take it easy and take it day by day. Because like I said, no, two days are the same and communication is the biggest key into any type of successful relationship, whether it be professional or like romantic, any type of thing with your family. There needs to be a clear line of communication for everything to flow smoothly. But when you have kids, nothing flows smoothly and nothing goes ever as planned. So like I would just encourage you to take it day by day, to be kind to yourself, to be kind to one another. Be good to your babies because they didn't ask to be here. You made them and nothing is ever their fault. They're so sweet and they're precious, and they just always deserve to be loved. Even when they're having tantrums, they don't know how to communicate. And it's our job as parents always comfort them and just to reassure them, even if we're not sure about ourselves, about ourselves. But that's our job as parents and individuals, to be able to center ourselves and to find ourselves again. And if that means having to go therapy or counseling or like, okay, I need to take a step back for a few minutes, give me a few minutes. And that's what I've learned to do since going to like counseling is being able to be kinder to myself because I was so hard on myself. Like, I should know this. And it's like, What am I saying? I don't know anything. I've never been a mother. I have two kids. Like I went from no kids to having two kids. That's a freakin upside down.

Amber-Rose Begay
Okay. Lexa, do you want to ask the next question?

Lexa Ingram
Yes. So, we were wondering, were there any moments that were funny or stood out to you during your pregnancy?

Alyssa Peaches Armendez
I don't think so. I remember like I had made a playlist. I didn't get to listen to anything. Like nothing went as I planned, like, all right, as imagined. But there was one part where one of the midwives she came and came in with, like a big plate of food. Like, I think that evening before I went into labor, she had put it in front of me and I was like, “Oh my gosh, I finally get to eat!” And then one of the nurses, the other nurses came in and they were like, “Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa. What are you doing? She can’t have food. She might have a C-section.” And I was so close to eating and I wanted to cry because, you know, like, like that day before, my husband had made this big ol’ plate of spaghetti for me to have this nice dinner and I didn't get to touch it. I just smelled it, and that was it. So I was like, I just want to eat, please. But I think that's the only like funny part because other than that, I was kind of like out of it for the most part. 

Amber-Rose Begay
Yeah, I remember my mom sneaking me some fries, for my second daughter, and I was so grateful for her. She had to like put them in her purse. I remember I couldn't eat, but I was so hungry. I can't believe you cannot eat while you're in labor.

Alyssa Peaches Armendez
Yeah, like, that’s not fair.

Amber-Rose Begay
Yeah, like we need our energy.

Alyssa Peaches Armendez
Like how are we supposed to get our energy? Like, pull it out of thin air. Okay. 

Amber-Rose Begay
Okay. Last question. How did you choose your children's names? 

Alyssa Peaches Armendez
Oh, so I had always loved the name Addison since I was, like, a teenager. Like, it just always stuck out to me, Addison, I told my husband, I said there's no ifs, ands, or buts. Her name is Addison. We call her Addy or we call her sis. And my son, my husband is the one who picked the name. His name is Amory. And he got it from a Scott Fitzgerald’s book. So that's where we got his name. And they both start with A, Addy “A” and AK. And AK, my son, his nickname is AK. His middle name is Kee, Amory Kee. So that's why we call him AK. And Kee comes from my husband's late grandfather. He passed away back in 2020 during the pandemic, so he got his middle name. And then my daughter, her middle name is Lynn. Addy Lynn. Addison Lynn. And that's my sister's middle name and my sister has always been my best friend, basically.

Amber-Rose Begay
Yeah. It sounds like you had a really great support system, which is so needed and necessary when you decide to have children and throughout the whole, even afterwards. I'm really glad to hear that. It's really uplifting. I think, you know, I just want to, I guess, reiterate how important that is for anyone listening. Lexa, do you have anything to add while we close here?

Lexa Ingram
I also just wanted to thank you for sharing your story and being so open with us. And it was really beautiful to hear. And I just love how you were willing to share everything with us and recognize that since you are a new parent, everything's new to you, and just trying to make sure everyone understands that as well. That is because not everyone's coming in at the same starting point when having children and it should be good that everyone knows that you’re all starting at the same point. You’re all new, so it's okay if you don't know anything and it's okay to ask questions. 

Alyssa Peaches Armendez
Yeah. And I also wanted to say, like me, once I became pregnant, I knew that I wanted to be different. I wanted to break all, like, this generational trauma. Like I wanted to be different. I am going to be different. I'm not going to raise my kids like this or I'm going to set boundaries. I want everything to be healthy. And that's what I had done throughout my entire pregnancy is, is be safe. I want it to be a safe space for my kids and I. And then my labor and delivery, I was so happy, like for COVID because I don't want anybody in the room because, like, that's such a special moment. Like, everything is so raw, you're so exposed and you just don't want anybody into that safe space. You know what I mean? So I was happy that I had my support system. The people I chose, nobody who was uninvited or whatever.

And then, like once we came home, the same thing. Safe space, no visitors. You can Facetime or whatever. And even now, with my kids, I'm still like that. I'm very protective of my kids. My kids’ safe space, my kids' energy, all of it. Because, you know, like in Navajo culture, like twins are a huge thing. Twins are a big blessing. So I have like my husband and I, we went to the flew market one time with the babies and there were people like, they saw the twins and they're like, oh, my gosh, twins. And like, they blessed themselves. And I was like, Gosh, what are we doing? Like, is that allowed? Like, are you supposed to be like, consent first? So I was like, Mom, can people do that? She was like, Yes. Like, people are like, twins are a blessing and people want to bless themselves. And I noticed that, too. Like, once I had my kids, everything was off, like my glasses. I saw a lot of things that I've never seen before, like with family and people who you thought were your friends, but they had like a sense of, like, jealousy, like, oh, it must be nice. And it's like, actually, this is really hard. And I don't appreciate you saying things like that to me because you have no idea how hard it is to have two babies at once. You know what I mean? And that's what I just really want people to understand was with twins, like, everything is out the door. Everything, you know, is out the door. Like you have no time for yourself. You get no sleep. And you, my babies, have completely different personalities. And just, there's no way to put into words like how much we love our children and how much we want to keep them safe. And a lot of people, they see it as, oh she's just stingy. Like, I am stingy. These are my kids. They need to be safe. They need to be respected and not just to be like, oh I wanna I went and saw Alyssa’s babies. And I don't share pictures of my kids, like their faces, nothing. So I'm like super, super protective of my kids and just setting healthy boundaries. And that's the thing that people are not used to, like older people and like even family. They get really upset, like, well why can’t I come over, you know? And I was like, this is my kids’ safe space and I'm sorry, but I don't want anybody else in it. It's not my problem basically. Yeah, like you were never there when I was pregnant and now all of a sudden you wanna be my family, or you want to be my friend cause I have twins? No, I don't think so. 

Amber-Rose Begay
Yeah, I, I like that you mentioned, you know, protecting your children's safe space, their energy. Like that is so important! And I just feel like a lot of people don't understand that. And you know this, our children are so sacred, their, their minds, what they see, what they hear. It's so important that we just try to heal ourselves. And I love too that you mentioned earlier that you wanted to, you know, become healthy to have a baby. Like that's a really great mindset that I feel like that needs to be understood and also just, you know, mindset that you need to have when you want to have children. Because once you have, you know, once you start getting healthy, physically, mentally, emotionally, spiritually, and you have that solid relationship with your partner, it'll happen. You know, it'll come about. And because you're preparing yourself. So it's, it's I mean, you sound like an amazing mom. You're doing a great job. And with your husband's support, with your mother, and your sister's support. And it's just very uplifting to hear your story, so again, thank you for sharing it today.

Alyssa Peaches Armendez
Thank you. I enjoyed it. I always love telling my birth story.

Amber-Rose Begay
I know we're going to have a lot of people probably listening in and you know, it's going to touch them. I feel like it really touched me in my heart and I just feel, it made my day. So thank you again

Alyssa Peaches Armendez
Yeah.

Amber-Rose Begay
All righty. Is there anything you say in closing by chance? 

Alyssa Peaches Armendez
I think just be good to yourself no matter what. Like everybody is always on a different journey and some people are ready to like receive love and give love. But some people aren't ready. They're not in that space yet, they're not in that time. So, like right now, I feel like a huge awakening for myself, like spiritually and like culturally. So I have this shift in my life. So I'm surrounding myself with a lot of new positive things and changing and I can feel it. And I really encourage like other Native, like Indigenous women, like speak up for yourself, support one another, be good to each other, mostly. Be supportive because not everybody has that support. Like, I'm always rooting for all of these women like, especially on social media, like I have other moms reach out to me and it's like, don't be ashamed. Like, don't be embarrassed if you have trouble. We all have troubles. Like social media is basically fake. You know what I mean? It’s our narrative like we put out what we want people to see. Nobody, like nobody ever would have guessed that I had postpartum depression until I said it recently. And we're like, Oh my gosh, I would have never known. And it’s okay to like share the bad stuff too, and not just the good things. But just always be supportive, be good to other people, be good to yourself. Be good to your babies. We all deserve it. 

Amber-Rose Begay
Thank you.

Outro
Ahe’hee. Thanks for listening to the MCH Podcast. For more information about the Navajo MCH Project, please visit us on Facebook at the Navajo Maternal and Child Health Project at Diné College.